Tired and Worn Out
Question:
I used to have goals and dreams, a real sense of purpose. But I no longer have that. I have failed in many of my goals, and when I do things that seem to be centered in purpose, like helping others succeed, they take all the benefits of my help, claim the successes as entirely their own, give me no credit, and leave me alone and forgotten in the dust. I am tired, worn out. The fact that I am bothered by how I am treated upsets me, and is clearly an indication of my shortcomings. I have a feeling of resignation, utter fatigue. I just don't want to try anymore.
Answer:
First, let’s honor your feeling of resignation and utter fatigue. Go ahead and resign. You can now quit being so utterly fatigued. Stop doing that tired, worn out way of being. You obviously do not enjoy being that way and you can quit the failure mode too if you like.
Next, maybe the people claiming success through your help need that success in their lives. If they are actually claiming the value of it, they obviously see a value in it. It may be the value they need to see in themselves and you may be someone giving them that sense of it. If you give to be appreciated, it was and is being appreciated. If you are looking for gratitude, give a lot more gratitude in your own life givings.
I have written extensively on the difference between appreciation and gratitude and I recommend you do some reading on how people often confuse them as being the same thing. You can read, or re-read my writings on the subject to understand this more.
When you see your values mattering, they are being appreciated. When the source of those givings is not so clear, it is a lack of gratitude.
Sometimes it’s simply because someone is selfish. But that selfishness can be happening all around too. When we give we should give because it’s what we like to do and because it’s how we like to be.
If the values of your givings are NOT being appreciated, no one will use them…they won’t matter to anyone. So, you can now see that your values were appreciated. It is a lack of gratitude and this happens when we continuously face outward away from source. I have also written extensively about this explaining it is a global problem.
When we lack gratitude, the values on the source side of our reasons become exhausted. This is why you are so fatigued.
If you want to improve your vitality, you need to center more inwardly as you cannot support all that appreciation where you currently dwell. This is why you want to sleep so much. You are gravitating inwardly to recharge.
If you want to sustain a better charge, you must resign the negativity values to reduce your power drain. To do this you must know more about the source of your reasons for giving the values you consider so important. Did you accomplish your reasons when they were given and appreciated? If so, move on and give some more. If not, adjust the nature of your givings to be more inwardly valuable…you are too far out in matter!
There are many, many people who will abuse a giver’s willingness to give. I have seen it many times. As you give of your self to become a giver of Self and a giver of a more sourceful relationship, you will become more value-able in your givings. This means you will be more able to adjust the values of your givings to be more in line with what you want to be more about.
If you breathe out six times and in two times, you will have to stop breathing out some to rebalance your breath. We are all learning to center our breathing more effectively.
As to your dreams and purpose… consider that you have not failed! The values were clearly appreciated. Try measuring your success more accurately. It’s also okay to adjust your dreams and purpose to better suit your current growth. When your givings were not yielding enough gratitude, consider that you were not giving the values that are more true to the position of your inner Self. Sometimes when we feel undervalued, it can be because we are undervaluing our real reasons and we are giving less than the truth of our purposes and dreams. Others may undervalue us because they are selfish. Let’s make sure we are not being too selfish, by expecting a lot of thanks for a value we are giving that is less than the value we are in life to give.
Open your dreams and purpose more fully and resign the negative feedback to center more in a deeper truth of yourself and the values of your reasons for being. Know that if you truly want to be more valuable, you must become more able to find the value important to you in any moment.
Sensei
